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5 Ways to control damage after a conflict in a marriage or other relationship.

1. Offer the offended party space. For many people, and particularly if the offended party is a loved one, the natural inclination will be to pull in closer … to become even more intimate in an attempt to ameliorate the … Continue reading 5 Ways to control damage after a conflict in a marriage or other relationship.

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Using the middle ground, chess, and rational problem solving to resolve disputes, and be happy together.

Even when we do find the solution in one situation, others will arise forever … in waves. They will challenge our will to be rational, and they will antagonize us into using a shortcut solution. Continue reading Using the middle ground, chess, and rational problem solving to resolve disputes, and be happy together.

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“So and So” should love me (the process of inquiring into and discarding useless beliefs).

If only I had eternal validation and unceasing, unblemished love from THAT person, I would be alright. Examining this, and other bizarre thought we all have (or have had), and the process of self inquiry. Continue reading “So and So” should love me (the process of inquiring into and discarding useless beliefs).

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Making gradual progress in discarding beliefs that control us. The fish and the hook.

Thoughts, themselves, are very difficult for people to “pass up”. In the CBT (Cognitive Behavior Therapy) sense, long term beliefs. Thoughts that we have that pertain to these beliefs, even for a person who is “enlightened” in many ways, it’s … Continue reading Making gradual progress in discarding beliefs that control us. The fish and the hook.

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How to apologize to an intelligent woman (not including your wife, version).

It’s possible for a man to have a deep, abiding love for a female that he’s never going to marry or fornicate with, even in site of the woman he has done both of those things with. And, it’s possible … Continue reading How to apologize to an intelligent woman (not including your wife, version).